Transcript
up you cool cats and kittens. Are you up? Are you up? This is take two episode seven with your
host B drop B. B. B. Sorry B. B. B. B. B. And your co-host, Aqua Metta X. I hope you all are doing
a fantastic this incredible Monday night. It is way past my bedtime. I don't know what I'm
doing. Yeah, okay. Still are you up? I don't know halfway. Am I drowsy? Yes. Have I drank a bottle
or a night well maybe maybe maybe that's going to make things interesting. Oh, this is going to be a
really fun space. So for those of you who haven't been here or don't know me, I am Bri the host of
you up. And the purpose of this space to have just genuine conversation about love, intimacy,
and communication. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. That's what it's all about.
You know, hopefully you learn something and you'll grow a little bit. We have four questions.
They are designed to expand your mind. So whether you're listening or you're involved in the
conversation, I appreciate you being here. Super grateful. Hi, Greg. Stop laughing. I appreciate
everybody being here. So let's get into it. Okay, so our first question of the night is,
I guess going to have to get it together here. What actually happens in our brains after sex?
Why can our emotions feel different afterwards? I'm not a doctor, but Oxytocin is typically released,
which is a chemical in our brain that can rewire connections to people. As one thing,
hold on, can I hear the question again? I'm sorry. Yeah, I actually have something to just
be gone about this. But you could have just answered the question first. I mean, I could, but you know,
it's not the it's not the brief shows. I wanted to give everybody an opportunity to chime in
before, you know, I'm on a lug the hell out of the space. But what actually happens in our brains
after sex? Why can our emotions feel different afterwards? Okay, I'll just take a little bit. Go ahead,
go ahead. It's called post-acglarity, I guess. All right, eager. You're done. Well, I mean,
the wording could have been different, but it's not inherently wrong. Yeah, I'll take it over.
I'm glad with words. You got my point though. So close enough, there's basically a little neurochemical
cocktail happening during and after sex, which is part of the reason why sex can affect your
emotions in sense of connections. You know, there's a release of dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins,
anoreopenepherin, which is adrenaline. And there's a small release. What?
Most stuff released as well, except that. Yeah, yeah, we get it eager. Thank you so much for that.
I really, really appreciate that so much. Thank you for that mature response. Thank you. That's
great. Yeah, so yeah, I mean that stuff always throws me off. I personally think that sex can
affect us emotionally more than we realize. You're sharing. Did she just rug? I guess again. Oh, man,
okay. I can take three and take a second crack at it. I think there's just so much vulnerability
and intimacy that goes along with sharing a moment like that with someone. So inherently,
you're, oh, people are crying. Am I rugged now too? No, you're good. Oh, okay. Oh, you got
this one. Oh, wait. Okay. I'm back. I'm back. Okay, Bri. Try again. We can hear you. Okay, one more
time. What where did I leave off? I'll be heard was the start off of things. Yeah, a lot of things.
Wow. Okay. All right. We're running it back. Okay. So yeah, I caught a lot of chemicals,
but I think that sex can affect us more emotionally than we realize. You're sharing something
really intimate with somebody. And afterwards you can feel closer, more vulnerable, attached,
or sometimes even a little bit distant. That's actually one of the reasons why I make it a point
to really get to know somebody before I sleep with them because it adds another layer like of,
you know, emotions. And you don't want to muddy the waters before you're on the same page with somebody.
Or like New York said, post not clarity. Anyway, yeah, absolutely.
I mean, before we move on from that, we have Jag on stage. Thank you for coming up and joining
the conversation. Jag, do you have anything that you want to add? You don't feel like you have to.
I mean, if you're just here to stage run, that's fine. I appreciate the support.
I have a bad record of putting it in. And it works, guys. I figured out it works.
Three times now I figured out it works. And, you know, I don't have to question about
if mine works or not. Well, that wasn't the question. Yeah.
I was talking about an airbide. If you're sitting on speaker or if he's actually talking about
the question, like I'm trying to figure out the connotations behind that statement.
Yeah. This is supposed to be a mature conversational space. I don't know if you got the memo, but
yeah, I mean, if you have kids, it definitely, it definitely works. So thank you for sharing that.
I really appreciate it. I'm glad. I don't know. I got that information in my brain now.
I just don't really have a, I don't really like another. I don't know. I don't know. I feel
about talking about this topic. That's fun. That is what the base of this space is. However,
so if you're not comfortable talking, you're more than like happy to stage farm, but we are trying
to have a mature conversation where we can be open with each other and learn from each other.
Absolutely. Thank you, Aqua. I appreciate that. Yeah. Beautifully, beautifully put.
All right. Unless Aqua or Devon have something that they wanted to add to that question,
I can just move on to the next one. Well, I think like, like you said, it's an intimate act,
right? So there's vulnerabilities that can come up. There's insecurities that could come up,
depending on what you guys are doing. You know, if you're in that phase where you're exploring
things and you don't know how the others are going to react to it, that's going to cause an
emotional response afterwards. Good or bad or not necessarily bad, but just like, maybe something
that needs to be communicated about afterwards. So I think it's a number of things. There's a number of
factors that go into it, right? If it's just like missionary saying, I love you 10 times,
it's probably not going to be you're not going to have the same emotional reaction as if you are like,
oh, well, honey, I just solved this thing. We should try it. And then it's like,
that's going to open up a whole can of potential emotional cocktail because now you're dealing with
things like potential shame or insecurities about something or just the sheer fact of like, this
is something new that is being explored and discovered and maybe we don't know what that's going
to be like. So that you're going to have that, you know, that teenage awkwardness of like fumbling
around and trying to get it right and, you know, whatever that that could look like. I mean, it's
going to be dependent on what it is you're doing, but I think it mainly has to do with like, it's just
one of the most vulnerable things you can do with someone is be naked with them and do that. So then
it's like, if it's going to be very different if it's your first time or your hundredth time doing
it with that person, right? You're going to have different emotional responses in both of those
occasions, even though it's the same action, right? So obviously, there's all the mental stuff that
you mentioned, the chemical releases, the dopamine and oxytocin and so on and so forth, but there's
also just like the pure act of like, we all have like a sense of judgment, self-judgment, you know,
judgment, it could be performance judgment, you might be like, oh, well, like, is she bored of
this? We've done it like eight times today is number eight, the best is number one. Like, is she
thinking about someone else? I'm thinking about someone else. So there's like a ton of things that
could be happening during that moment that could lead to like an emotional response from either partner.
If you're, if a female that you're with is having thoughts during that you're thinking about
someone else, sure as shit, you're going to have an emotional response afterwards or during,
it might just ruin the whole thing, right? Invite versa. Well, it's not calling out the other person's name.
So, right? Yeah, well, I mean, no one would have ever experienced that.
I have not blood still. I have blood still. I have blood still.
I'm not ashamed. I have. I have experienced both ends, you know, she said someone else's name before
or someone else's name and it's not even like it wasn't out of like, oh, I'm fantasizing about
this other person. It's like, I had been with that other person much longer and then like, I don't
know, I don't, I couldn't really tell you why it happened because like going into it.
That's just the problem. I'm really thinking about it, but it's like in the moment that's like
the name that came up and it was, it was definitely a very emotional conversation. I've heard after. Yeah.
I mean, it's not like a shameful thing. I think, you know, what Aqua was saying, like, I think when
you are with somebody for a very long time and like, you know, it, it's just more, maybe like just
out of habit. It's like ingrained in your brain. But yeah, I can only imagine that conversation after
was super, super uncomfortable. So, you know, but you got through it and you're stronger for it.
Yeah, just look these comfort, sorry, go ahead. No, it was definitely a little awkward in the moment,
but we got past it. It was fine. You know, we can go on to the next question. I think.
Okay. I'm not very nervous myself. Awesome. No, not quite before you up is the dangerous mix.
Yeah, yeah, we're going to be seeing you a whole different side of Devon. I can't wait.
To stage the ball. Hello, hello, Aqua, Bri, Devon, hope everybody is doing well this wonderful evening,
afternoon, morning, whatever it is, wherever you're at, hope everybody is doing well.
We're doing even better now that you're here. Thank you for joining us. We really appreciate it.
Appreciate you for letting me out. Of course, you're always welcome on this stage, Devon.
Okay, our next question is. Yeah, y'all, y'all ever take a dump and then like, both of your legs just
fall asleep and then when you get up, you're like back to fall over. Yeah, you're done. You're done.
You're done. Anyways, I've retracted my previous statement. No, I'm just kidding.
Our next question is, what does aftercare look like to you and does it change depending on the type
of connection? Aftercare, after make love, aftercare, what does it look like?
Yeah. I mean, it's kind of hard not to have post-nut clarity but aside from that,
but we're talking more of a mature sense. Say you're in a relationship,
what does it look like? Does it change depending on the type of connection? You're in a long-term
relationship currently, right? That's going to look different than maybe if you're the type of person
that has casual sex with people. Yeah, 100%. It's definitely two different
treat them two different ways. My main jawn, is she going to get the full? I care about you,
type of treatment, but if it's just like, it's just a quick fly-by, a summer fling type of thing,
it's kind of just like, don't touch me. So instead of making chicken...