Processing Hayden Panettiere’s Death - Part✌️

enforcement agencies where we have engineered early warning systems to kind of keep an eye out for employees. And you can do that in your own life. And here just a few quick tips, some of these I mentioned yesterday. The biggest thing is our changes in behavior, such as doing something a lot more than they used to or doing something a lot less than what they used to like. They used to be prompt and now there's a lot of tardiness to work or even absenteeism. But it can also go the other way. The trajectory of suicide is such that people tend not to commit suicide on the downswing but the upswing. And it's something that I learned really, really early on in my psychology education that you can look at it as a bit of a trajectory. That when people are on the upswing, it's when they become behaviorally activated. One of the greatest drivers of depression, behavioral deactivation. And you would think that behavior activation is a good thing. And normally it is. But with suicide, the behavioral activation is in a single direction toward ending their life because the person comes to believe, hey, I can do this. I can make a decision. I can make sure I never suffer this much again. And I can end it right here. I was watching the, I've taken up my wife and I during dinner, we will watch Dateline NBC, you know, murder mysteries and all that kind of thing. I wasn't all that familiar with the Jody Rice case. But an interesting thing that she said after they found her guilty and, you know, of course she's subject to the death penalty is she said, and this is her words. I don't agree with this, but she said something like, you know, death is the greatest release. And I would hope that mine will come, you know, soon as possible or something like that. See, people really believe that. That's a very definitive and at the same time very dangerous direction of a person's thinking. And when they start thinking that way, they can actually, you know, the thinking is behind the scenes. Thought processes, engineer behavior. You can't see thought processes, but you can see behavior. And of course, then make inferences. And often when people look like they're on the upswing, they're at their most critical, most dangerous moment. Part of a good early warning system, whether it's in your company or your organization, your school agency or even your family is watching for drastic changes of behavior, either down or up. And we'll talk about that a little bit more later. But I did want to kind of get that on the radar. But stipulate that this space today, you're welcome to come up and process your own thoughts about the death of this lovely actress, this lovely human being. But also, you know, what did it get you to thinking about in your life? You know, did it, did it foster you to be more aware of others or maybe it even fostered you toward more of your own struggle? And that's okay. You know, that's okay. And we'll process through some of those. You're welcome to take a mic and share some of those thoughts and experiences. And we have four mics left open. Go ahead and grab one and love to hear from you. I want to hop over to Darren and then when TMR is ready, TMR just jump right on there and they're my friend. But Darren, what are some of your thoughts of maybe some things we left off yesterday that be useful to talk about today? I thought to see. Can you go to TMR and then I'll go on to TMR? Yeah, absolutely. TMR, if you're ready, take it away. Yeah, I'm glad to be back here with everyone on, unfortunately, not so good of a topic. But we can make something of it. And I just wanted to shout out everyone who came yesterday to talk about everything that we talked about. And of course, shout out to Lady Wings. I know you had lots to share. And I'm glad you're here and always glad that you keep coming back because you have wonderful things to share. So I can't wait to see what you have to say. But I'll keep it short and sweet. And I will touch on something I didn't touch on yesterday. And it's kind of been alluded to. And unfortunately, I think social media can be one of the worst. And sometimes one of the best places to talk about this stuff, mainly because people don't know what in the world they're saying. And Dr. Eath, you kind of started off with this. We don't actually know very important facts about this case, about many cases. And we are quick to just close loops. And people say it was this. It was definitely that or they're hiding this from you or it had to have been this. And unfortunately, I think that gets us into the weeds because then we just start blaming people, saying what should have happened could have happened. And I think one of the most destructive thought processes is we knew this was going to happen because we don't know anything's going to happen. But we can be the Monday, you know, morning quarterback or whatever they call them. They're like, oh, all the signs were here. But I think that's kind of dangerous because of the daisy chain you talked about Dr. Eath, we have to make it to the different stages in our own brains before we go ahead and enact certain things. So just observing someone in a one-off interview or one conversation you have with someone doesn't mean that they are going to or not going to do something. But saying, oh, I knew it all along or I knew they never would. You know, I think it's just it becomes not the most constructive conversation. So I think we're having great conversation in this space. I think people are coming up with wonderful ways to talk about what we can do, what we might not be able to do. So I just wanted to kind of throw that in there. That social media can be one of the most dangerous places to talk with this because people want to just close loops when we don't always have to close a loop. We don't always have answers. But we can work together to try and figure out what we can do. Yeah, very good because it's mind reading isn't it's all we're doing is making best guesses. And I think instead of running around making guesses about why someone did it or why didn't we know or oh yeah, here with the signs, we're going back and trying to retrofit current data to pass circumstances and it lends itself to confirmation bias. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, this puzzle piece fit there when when really it didn't we're just kind of massaging the data to fit our own conclusions, which is a dangerous thing. But very good, very good. And say when you're ready, just let me know. I'd love to hear from you. I know you're very busy. Yeah. I'm here. I'm here. Thank you, Dr. Heat. Can you hear me? Yes, yes, you sound great. Go right ahead. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for the space and thank you TMR and Darren for hosting. I just want to say that made this role of Hayden, Reston Piste. He's part of our lives when we are the other because we all watched Heroes and we're vested in the show. We all believe that saving a chair leader is like saving the world. And it's one of those TV series that actually brought me together with members of my family. Something we all watch together. We see together as one and giving the circumstances of our debt. Also knowing fully well that she's a young and promising person. And it begins to tell us that we all want another that's communion, that engagement to be able to have somebody that will then always reach out to when we have struggles, you know, which would also look at the means through which you don't look for substances or anything whatsoever. It may be that can't help our health as an escape route. You know, when we're having struggles and it's always good to have support plans, you know, how can they look when I'm feeling down and I need to. I feel like talking to somebody rather than causing problems online or whatever you find. You can know one wonderful space where you can contribute. Listen to people speak and engage other people. Have people within your immediate community that you can talk to. But the funny thing is that people who are public figures who are highly influential found to be the loneliest because people, everyone, looks at you and they think you're fine. Everything is going well or they heard your spaces yesterday or they saw something you did on TV and because of that, everything must be going on fine. But you know, it's always good for one to find people who connected real you, not the idea of the world about you, who you can feel free enough to engage, you know. So that human connection is very important. And I always use this example that in the early days of the element, when people commit an offense against the community, they don't kill them, they don't sentence them to death or anything. They just put them in an isolated place and then they feel the impact of community. They feel the impact of having people around them and then they end up taking their own lives. So when we feel as humans, we are beautiful for community. It's not just about ourselves, our immediate relationship for the larger community around us. That's why we have to impact our environment, we have to influence or inspire people to find the best in themselves. And I wish that so rest in perfect peace. And for those who are close to our family that go for God to grant them the fortitude to bear the loss. It is a great loss indeed. And I pray that anyone here who is struggling or going through something very difficult, who is still finding it difficult to reach out and talk to other people should do so. Find a way. There's nothing to be well going through something. I will only call somebody back here. Dr. G. Seger, thank you. And while you're talking, it reminded me of a quote of Einstein. I knew he said something kind of amazing about being lonely. And I looked at the quote, I'll try, I'll post it the Jumbo Tron. He said, it is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely. And I'm also reminded of the video I saw many decades ago of some really, really rich person. You know, a member of a rich family, I don't recall what family. Maybe the, I don't know, some some famous American corporate family, something like that. And the man had become a Christian. And he had this to say about his conversion to Christianity. He said it was really, really strange that I would see people all around me being given the gospel, being told the good news, being witness to from the Christian faith. But it seems that no one wants to approach the rich man. He said, even though I wasn't left out of, you know, the earthly riches of life, I risked being left out of the eternal riches of Christ, glory. And he just pondered that it was such an amazing thing that no one would come and talk to him. And he was so grateful that someone finally did because he was lonely for the good news of eternal life. And say you make a good point about, you know, people being in that world so far removed from the rest of us, because there's the belief that they have it made and they have, you know, what do you buy someone or what do you get someone that has everything? Well, look, no one on the planet, no one on the planet has everything. And my years in psychology and working with people from the poorest to some of the richest people in the world, you know, the 1%, the 1%, the 1%, no one truly has everything. It is a, it is a guys. It is a, what would you call it, a illusion. It's an illusion that people that live in really big houses or have really big companies or have a lot of political or economic power really have everything because everyone is lacking something. Everyone is lacking something. And guess what? One of the biggest things people lack is a true friend. You know, someone that as the scripture says, sticks closer than a brother. Some of the loneliest, most downtrodden people I've ever met are people that you would look at across the street of life and think that they had everything, just like Hayden Panatteri. I would see her on commercials, you know, she didn't answer a name and I would think to myself kind of subconsciously, oh my goodness, you know, here's a here's a young lady that has it all, but not true, not true. I think that we become ourselves, uh, dumbed down and blind to the needs of other others because of all the glitz and the glamour and the showmanship of Hollywood and wealth and fame and fortune. Okay, I'm gonna go to Darren and then I'd like to hear from Lady Wings who we left off with yesterday. Let her get her thoughts together. But Darren, what do you say? Yeah, hi Dr. Heath. It's nice to be up here with you all again today. I will have to go out at the top of the hour, but you seem to be running a tight ship so you're probably closed by them. But if you see me just disappears just because I've got a client at seven, right? I'm not only processing this high profile suicide in the UK, there has been another one. And it was a, like, I believe one of maybe the first black professors or young black professors, like, uh, I, I'm not one in to emphasize the race, but that's what is being emphasized to the point where the story was that I think he was really