🎙️ Spaces for beginners - Practice speaking and AMA EP31.

The first rule of hosting spaces is get a co-host and he had never hosted a space I think he done one or two and he said no. I said what do you mean no? He said no. I said well can you elaborate? He said no. I can elaborate. I said I'm saying you should have a co-host what are you saying? He's like I don't need a co-host co-hosts are unnecessary. Something like that. Well well well. A year later he came back to my space and he said a he's like well you're right. I once went to a space and the co-hosts kicked me and I then realised how important it is to get a good co-host so you were correct. So no one rule spaces is get a good co-host. You co-sign this now? I definitely co-sign this because you know as good as it is me talking nonsense to myself it's always handy to have someone there want to get go because then someone you know as soon as people come in there's something ready for them to listen to and it's nice to have backup you know if you've got a trust worthy co-host you know that if you do get them trolls in then you're not quite on the ball at that moment in time then you've got someone else to back it for you. Fat check through. The reason I brought up FITS you hosted a good space you're good for and FITS was kind of upset it was interrupting and I think you kicked him do you remember what happened in the space? I put him in time. He had to he had warnings. He kept interrupting me the host and then he got upset that I'm muted him and I very rarely mute people. If I keep asking you to be quiet so I can get my sentence out and you continue to show over me I will mute you. He had free warnings and I did say that if he continued he would be putting time out so he would go and calm down and then he could come back and try again in five minutes time. So I kicked him down to I think as a listener and then he left the space entirely. But we're still cool but he knows better than to you know test my boundaries now you know I think it's very it's good to start with a firm foot and then people know from the get go what you won't put up within your space. So he was disrupting your flow and you just gave him a little time out to you know he was spas in out hit slap he was spas in out he was spas in out that was actually and I think that from memory he said it was all in good fun it was certainly good fun for me and the other listeners we're enjoying it so yeah I had a way of a time it was a great space. It was a lot of fun Tankenfen. Let's ask Preston about flow Preston do you agree with me that if you close the space and then immediately reopen it the same people same everything and you just say okay we're going to pick up do you agree it's not the same space like the flow is very very important in my opinion what do you think? Yeah I mean look there's reasons why that would be a call feature you might want to close your space each slap and send all your listeners to Mia who's hosting a space right after you could kind of close your space and send all the same people to another space but from what I'm hearing just doing it in that sense what you're describing ruins the flow destroys the space it kind of it starts everything again and when you start a space of course nobody wants to come up and be the first speaker so it kind of just ruins a good conversation for me it's an unnecessary pause and unnecessary stop unless you're dreaming of a call feature that could be used to in a very good way or you've had a crashed space and you want to restart it I don't see any good reason to do anything like that. How important is conversational flow you know for new speakers we sometimes get this question I want to talk about something the conversation moves on cannot bring it back or should I talk about the new thing how important is conversational flow for new speakers. Well three years ago hit slapper we actually were talking about whether you like so did I just go off topic no it's it's a skill that I think must be learned because everyone wants to speak on the space and if you've been on a space more than once you know that you're going to be waiting a little while to come up and speak and chances are that what you wanted to say when you originally put your hand up nobody's talking about anymore the conversation has well and truly moved on and I think this is not just a spacer skill this is a life skill if you're in a group of five or six mates and everyone's talking by the time you get a chance to say what you wanted to say maybe the conversations moved on as well so there's ways to do it look you can you can kind of find a way to bring it back but if you are in experience if you don't have that ability that skill set to keep that flow going in a sense that would bring it back to what you want to talk about my advice would be to always have something that are ready to say on the topic at hand maybe what you wanted to say has moved on but if your hands still up make sure you want to comment on what everyone's talking about at that time and of course if the conversation has moved on you can always just drop down from speaker you can leave a comment you don't have to get it out every space sometimes you will just miss out and that's okay you don't need to what i would describe as a hissy fit over not getting to say what you wanted to say in that space because there will always be another space there will always be another opportunity of course i have more to add but i want to let swerge jump in and then i want to hit you in a couple more than i've asked me a similar question so just to give a little prelude i had a subscriber who was waiting too long on my space she said uh you know other people have jumped in ahead of me i'm unsubscribing and then a second person also joined in and said yeah i've been waiting a long time too i'm also unsubscribing so i was getting attacked in my own comments by two people who unsubscribed ganged up and then joined into attack me the thing they didn't take into account everybody on the stage was a subscriber everybody except for like one or two people so they're like this other person overleaped yeah everybody was subscribers i was trying to get to everyone so listen i do understand the frustrations sincerely i know there are a long ways in my spaces um but also i try to do a good job to to kind of warn people yes the i the only promise to make is everybody will speak i will i've never closed the space and said sorry guys i got to go if you're there and you're in state you're going to hand up you will get to speak i'll never close the space but there might be a bit of a wait so i'm going to ask you about that in a minute person and i'm going to ask you about attention um all i will say is attention but i will come back to it i want to let's barra jump in swara welcome to the space my friend how's it going? yeah good thanks um i was just going to say i don't know if there's a right or a wrong answer to this about conversational flow and i think it depends on the space and it might also be a something to do with the skill of the host um so famous is marathon spaces he doesn't mind at all if you go back to a spate uh if you go back to a topic that was covered hours ago um he doesn't mind at all and he makes it work whereas i remember um once i was in a um what's it called like a popcorn space and i had said something and then someone responded to me then the host went someone else um so they didn't give me a chance to respond back and then when i got the mic again um or maybe i can't remember it was a hand space and maybe it was a bit of popcorn as well i can't remember exactly but when i got on the mic again i tried to go back to that topic and then they were like oh no we've moved on from that which is fair fair you know if that's how you want to run the space that's fair i'm not complaining about that but it's i think it's also a skill thing um both both the part of the speaker and the host so so yeah um i don't i don't think there's a right or wrong answer to this what do you think it's laps died do you know i let me see um on my back get back okay sorry uh the app completely froze and i had to drop out reconnect as far as the last thing i heard was there isn't a right or wrong answer it depends on the host is that and i heard you mentioned famous is that correct yeah i mentioned famous and i mentioned another host which was um sort of a mix between popcorn and hands but the yeah you can just do the last 20 seconds i heard you say uh in famous the space is he doesn't mind if you um kind of circle back and then and drop down which might say in the last bit again yeah so in famous this space he doesn't mind um if you go back to the topic that was raised hours ago um especially in his marathons and then i gave an example of another host where um it was kind of a popcorn style space but it was using hands as well but the the topics were pretty free flowing um and so i i said something and then someone else responded but then the host went to some um like a third speaker who introduced like a completely different topic and then when when the mic came back to me um i tried to go back to whatever i wanted to respond to uh and then the host was like oh no we moved on from that um so i i just uh gave up the mic at that point um so i'm not saying they're wrong but it's it's partly like um it's partly just it's it's both a speaker and the host kind of there's a skill to it um and also like this is partly why when i run a space i i stick to one topic like a debate and i don't i would find it hard to manage that kind of space so i i make it easy for myself i agree that if you're a good host you can make it work um famous as a very good job at this i hope i do an okay job at this um but i also agree as a general rule if you're a speaker uh it's best to just go with the new topic um i think as a listener experience when people get jump back and forth i think generally that's uh you know creates for a worse conversation but sometimes then again it can depend because the conversation can run its course so yeah i agree generally speaking the flow method is better if you've got a good host like a maker worked um if they're skillful but uh generally speaking going with the flow i think is better totally agree great point swara um let me ask press then about um so press and i did subscribe that was waiting too long she un-subscribed another woman also says you're waiting too long she un-subscribed day attack me and it replies how how how if you blocked me like i get you un-subscribed fine real mutuals unsubscribed and blocked me because she was waiting too long and as she made a post on her timeline she said i'm not gonna take any shit from anyone and i was like i think i how is making you wait and giving you shit what the hell does anyone some people don't realize i'm not being rude but when there's a certain people on stage everybody wants to speak at once but only one person can speak at a time and i run the system i let each person talk for about 20 to 30 minutes roughly roughly including my talk time and there's 13 people in stage you know that's a lot of minutes and only one person can go to time and there's gonna be a bit of a kiss so i don't know what do you reckon person about you know leaving subscribers waiting too long should you let subscribers leapfrog everybody else and what do you do and everybody's a subscriber how do you decide who to let go first do you have any source person i would say i do like to let subscribers leapfrog everyone else and i guess it goes back to what swarrow is saying a little bit every every host likes to run their space differently but that's just something i like to do it's something i find most people like to do but i don't know why they're subscribing just because they think they're gonna get a quicker turn talking on a space personally i subscribe to you for the shirtless pictures in in the group chat but uh that's just me um yeah i think it's difficult when you do have a large kind of subscriber base and people think they are people are very self-centred they think i subscribe to you so i should get a quick turn to talk and i don't realize that every single other person in that space or at least a majority are also subscribed to you thinking the same thing and of course you can't please everyone all of the time uh so i think it just have to go back to what i was saying before you really just have to as a subscriber as a speaker in the space you really everyone wants to speak like i've got things to do after this space i don't want to be waiting for seven other people to speak and have to wait 40 minutes to get what i have to say out but i also i i'm not gonna be upset if i miss out so of course everyone wants to speak everyone's got things to do everyone's got a real life that they can't wait around forever uh but i think the difference between the two types of people is some people get upset about it and others just say oh well i'll try again another time and i think the more you are in that second category the more you will be liked by spaces hosts of course you can't please everyone all of the time you're going to let your subscribers down sometimes you're going to leave